ILLINOIS DIVORCE LAW BLOG

Divorce is a very difficult life transition. Divorce is known to be one the highest stress events of a person’s life, especially when the divorce was unexpected or involves dramatic changes to the children in the marriage.

My job as a divorce and custody attorney is to help my clients navigate the divorce process as successfully as possible. Divorce is a difficult process, but it should not be a “war.” Wars, as we all know, end with casualties on both sides, cost a lot of money, and leave wounds that do not heal.

What basic advice can I give to help divorcing parties manage the stresses of divorce?

Divorces cost too much. I have practiced long enough in Illinois to understand that the process in the Illinois Court system of divorcing and reaching custody determinations takes too long, and costs the divorcing parties too much. My fees for divorce cases, including those that reach trial are always a fraction of that of my opponent’s fees, and I work hard to keep costs down for my clients, but I still feel that the present system promotes delay, stress and cost for families. Why is this so, and how can all of us in the system work to change it?

First, the process itself is inefficient. Divorce cases are filed, and the courts set lengthy periods in which the opposing parties appear to set case management schedules. Then there is the endless march of discovery: Marital Interrogatories and lengthy and cumbersome Requests to Produce Documents, subpoenas of bank and credit card records that the parties won’t produce voluntarily, depositions, motions, hearings over temporary issues: all of this activity which is billed to the client by the hour.

If the case can’t settle, there is trial preparation. Finally, months later, the trial date, whereupon the judge sets a pretrial conference in chambers and the lawyers and judge work toward settlement with the judge’s input. The lawyers then go out into the courtroom hallway and work with their clients under the pressure of the trial setting and try to settle the case.

Virtual Visitation and Out of State Removal of Children

“Virtual visitation” is a term that is gaining relevance in Illinois divorces. It refers to using online video programs like Skype to create a visual and audio connection by which physically distant parents can connect online with their children.

A recent New York divorce case granted a mother’s request for permission to move with her children to Florida, despite the fact that the children’s father would continue to live in New York. As a condition of the removal order, the mother had to agree to allow the children to visit with their father via Skype, an Internet service that allows for live videoconferencing. The New York judge noted that economic conditions justified the move, as the parents’ house was underwater, employment prospects were dim, and the mother had supportive family in Florida.